Life.

The feeling I have from being a mom is amazing. I thought I already knew the feeling and understood it. But I didn't. All my understanding has increased and deepened these past two months. Sure Sure. You're whole childhood you play with dolls or barbies and you are the "mom". I also don't think I have ever once taken for granted my mom and the things she did for me. (Okay maybe I did when I was a bratty teenager.) As I got older I was so grateful for everything she did for me. The only thing I was missing was the understanding of it all. I don't think anyone will ever have the understanding of being a mom until they are one. Everything I thought I knew and loved and was grateful for, that my mom did for me, now comes with an even deeper understanding. An understanding I didn't know existed. I don't know how to explain it. But the fact that I know what it is now like to truly sacrifice my time, my sleep, etc. to take care of this child. It's amazing. And while I'll readily admit that I'm not the happiest when he wakes up in the middle of the night, and I may let out a string of cuss words (in my head of course) at Ty because he gets to keep sleeping and doesn't need to get up, I still do it and I still love my little critter. It's amazing how sacrifice works now. It brings a new level to how grateful I am for my mom. She did so much for me...and my siblings. (Of course this applies to my dad, and fathers as well) I don't know how she did it, or how mothers do it in general, but something inside me says it's out of love. And I would do anything for my child. I'm so grateful for my parents and everything they did for me.

On a lighter note. Maybe I'll update you with some pictures I took. Since you havn't seen him since he was a month...and that picture was a lame one, here's a good few of him at 2 months!

 He got his Shots Friday July 29th. It was so sad. He always get the saddest pouty lip. When he got his shots he stuck out that lip, tears filled his eyes, then he just let out some screams. Sad kid. Thankfully Tyson was there, and Ty held him down for them. Still though. Made me cry. He did pretty good after them too. He cried out in pain a couple of time later that day, but he mostly just slept. Saturday he was just fussy, but Sunday he was back to himself.

     Few notes from the doctors: He's doing great! He's growing...and growing. He now weighs 12.15. Yes he has doubled his weight. (shouldn't they do that at 4 months??...) But he's only in the 75th percentile. (Not that I agree with the standard percentile crap medical advice) but hey. He's a big kid. I guess he get's his chub from me! Looks are from dad. Sorry kiddo! I still can't figure out how he is holding his weight though. He doesn't have any fat rolls on his legs or arms. I'm thinking it's all in his belly and his head. Or he's just one solid kid. Wish I carried my weight good. His head is 40.5. whatever that is, and his length is 23.5. He's a keeper.

     Few notes about Pace at 2 months: He started smiling, and I love his smile. He's started to know my voice/face and when he is fussy and sees and hears me he will calm down and smile at me. I love it. He is happiest in the mornings, and will chat with me in the morning the most. He's still allergic to dairy. And I'm craving a pizza like there is no tomorrow. I'm already planning a pizza and dessert party the day I can have dairy again. He's watching the olympics and I may be brainwashing him to like sports. (It could potentially backfire and  he wont like them, but he seems to enjoy watching them at least) He LOVES to suck on his fist. It's darling. He used to take the binky but now he almost prefers his fist. I'm not sure how I feel about that...at least a binky I could take away, but how do I break a habbit of thumb sucking? Not that I want either a thumb sucker or a binky taker. But every kid has some sort of comfort item. He's sleeping really well. He goes anywhere between 5-8.5 hours of sleep every night. Averaging more on the longer end of sleep. Which keeps me happier. haha.

     Few notes about Ty. He's still alive, and he loves his little boy. He always comes home and gives me a kiss and Pace a kiss. He'll always take him and play with him the second he gets out of the shower from being home. Pace has started to learn that when he's with dad it's play time and with me it's sleep time/eating time. Crummy deal. I wanna be the fun parent! haha. Ty does as much as he can to be around Pace on the weekends. Sundays Ty always takes him and is the one always holding him. It's darling. He's a great dad. Ty starts OB/GYN tomorrow. He's got night shift for OB until next Tuesday. Bummer deal. He'll be gone from 4pm until 6am then sleep until roughly 1:30pm then be gone again at 4. Kinda sucks for us. But we'll survive. It's the beginning of a new hardship and we'll survive and push through it. Just gotta learn to make the most of the time we have together.

How about our cat Nilee? Are you wondering about her? Well she's doing great! I think so at least. I know at times he feels a little ignored. Mostly by me. It's hard having 2 "kids". I don't know what I'll do when I actually DO have two REAL kids. She has been FANTASTIC with Pace. She is just now starting to rub up next to him for affection. It's cute. But the minute he moves she scatters! With our new place, came an awesome backyard that she has been loving!! She literaly sits at the door and whines and scratches it like a dog does when they want to go out. It's great. She loves being outside. She doesn't run away, she will just sit in the grass in the shade. The only thing that'd be much much cooler about this situation, is if she learned that she could go to the bathroom out there. That'd be ideal. Good BYE litter.